What a difference a year makes

I wanted to come on here to reflect on this past year as the new year begins.  Before I started, I wanted to read my blog post from the beginning of last year.  Wow!  What a difference!  I knew where I was at this point last year and I knew it wouldn't be a "happy" post, but I forgot exactly how I felt in that moment and it is such a reminder of how blessed I am.  2013 started off with our miscarriage.  We had undergone our first IVF experience at the end of 2012 and it had been successful only to be taken away in an instant.  2013 started out so sad...I had felt that things wouldn't get any better, but I tried so hard to keep a positive outlook on things.  Thank goodness for that, because the year turned out to be such a good one!  In April, we took 2 of our frozen embryos and implanted them.  I was so scared and nervous that it wouldn't work, but it did!  God is so good!  We gave birth to our beautiful twin boys in November and I can't imagine life without them.  I often wonder why the first pregnancy after IVF didn't take, but we would have never met these sweet boys if it did.  "God has perfect timing; never early, never late.  It takes a little patience and a whole lot of faith, but it is worth the wait."

I know I have talked a lot about or struggles, pregnancy, and now our beautiful babies, but it has been a big year for the older kids as well.  2013 marked the end of preschool and the beginning of kindergarten for my "baby".  Aeson is officially a big boy now!  Although, he will always be my baby...even with these two new babies.  He thrived in preschool and started out doing well in kindergarten.  He is still doing ok in school, but I think he has had some trouble with all the new adjustments in his life.  He not only has 2 new baby brothers, but actually 3!  His dad and his wife also gave birth to a baby boy in October.  Hopefully this new year will be a good one for him as he adjusts to this new life as a big brother.  He is so in love with these babies and even though he isn't sure he wants them around, I know he will be an amazing older brother to all three of his little brothers.

Bryden has also had a big year.  He started 3rd grade and other than one little hiccup with his grades, he has been such an AWESOME kid!  He is doing well in school and I have never gotten so many positive comments from one of his teachers.  He is thriving in his class and is very helpful to the other students and is apparently quite the little leader.  I never imagined he would be this way.  He has never been a bad kid or a poor student, but I figured he was more like me and would just quietly take a seat in the back and keep to himself.  I'm so glad he didn't get that quality!  He has not only been awesome in school, but he has grown up so much at home.  He still has his moments and argues or doesn't listen to what we have to say, but for the most part he has become such a good son.  He is so helpful around the house and hardly ever puts up a fight when we ask him to do something.  It has been such a bittersweet year for me in regards to Bryden.  I feel sad that he has grown up so much, but it is also such an amazing thing to watch.  It is so easy to doubt your parenting skills, but when you watch your child becoming such a good person, you have to tell yourself that you must be doing something right.  Maybe not everything...but something.

As for me and Alex, this past year has probably been pretty challenging for our relationship.  I'm sure 2012 was worse, but Alex has had to put up with so many hormonal issues!  From IVF to pregnancy to postpartum...oh my....  Not many men can handle all of that well and I don't blame them!  However, he has been such an amazing husband throughout everything.  I know I don't let him know this enough, but I am so thankful for him.  I have loved watching him become a dad.  He was already a great father figure in Bryden and Aeson's lives, but watching him become a dad has been really beautiful.  I truly can't wait to see what the next year has waiting for us.